Comments on: Spare A Thought For The Children Who Are Victims Of Parental Alienation This Easter

By: EMIL

EMIL — Fri, 31 May 2013 20:15:52 +0000

It is Reasonable for a father to be deprived of his children after a vengeful mother , seeking for ATTENTION , is coached by A FEMALE CAFCASS OFFICER who lies on Oath ! Why is this a such a CORRUPT place ! Where else do Fathers need to turn to ?

By: http://www.fathers-rights.co.uk/2012/04/spare-thought-children-victims-parental-alienation-easter/ | emilwamba

Tue, 29 Jan 2013 23:01:18 +0000

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By: Blythe

Blythe — Thu, 27 Dec 2012 17:06:13 +0000

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By: Wendy Shearman

Wendy Shearman — Thu, 08 Nov 2012 14:08:51 +0000

Your comments have so much in common with my what my Son has gone/going through still with his separation from wife and access to his son. She indeed has made sure that through careful manipulation he was portrayed as abusive and aggressive. when in actual fact it was her, there was one time when she came home and my son was playing with his two yearold son on the floor she was so jealous she put her foot across my sons neck and pinned him to the floor. I have witnessed many times when she would turn and punch or slap him round the head in front of me and my son has said she would try and provoke by blocking his path and smacking him around the head. She also took herself off to revenge. All so she could gain control of their son and since their separation has denied him proper access. He pays her maintenance and also pays for other things, she has moved 250.00 miles and refuses him proper access to his son. As yet he has not gone through mediation or courts because he does not have the means and she has repeatedly threatened she will make it so awkward so it has to keep going back to court so it ramps the bill up. Until there are proper rights in place for fathers and proper deterrents for females like this in place, the children will always suffer because they are being used in the worst possible way and unfortunately government bodies are party to all this.

By: ALF

ALF — Thu, 04 Oct 2012 15:14:20 +0000

John and Stuart,
I can sympathise with you both 100%. My soon to be ex-wife has severe mental health problems which means she simply cannot cope with caring for our son (who is 4) and our new baby girl (who is now 8 months old). She flipped and decided she didn’t want to be with me in March this year. She too left and went to a women’s aid refuge blaming me for being “an abusive husband” and being “controlling”. I’m lucky and come from a very loving and caring family, and I don’t even know what being controlling or abusive means. All I ever did was love my wife, despite her well documented health issues, and love my son and daughter as much as I could. Social service became involved with us even before my daughter was born as my wife had some kind of breakdown in the school with my son which raised concerns. The social are absolutley useless and keep telling me their only concern is the welfare of the children. Can anybody explain to me how it’s in the best interest of my children, especially my son, to be kept away from their loving father? I did manage to get some contact with them started again on approx June 16th, about 10 weeks after she left. This continued without any issue until August 19th when I had a fall out with my ex-parents in law. They turned up to collect the children from me, as their mother was “too busy” to get them herself (she was actually attending church), without car seats for a 4 year old and 8 month old baby. I explained I wasn’t happy about this, and that they couldn’t take the children without the correct seats, and all my ex-father in law could do was tell me to “p*ss off, p*ss off”. Charming. Anyway, as tit-for-tat the ex-wife then abruptly stopped contact, telling people I had smacked my son (never, ever true), and that I couldn’t see my children. The social do nothing as it’s her word against mine, and my son and daughter are caught in the middle. We had some great times during the summer when I had contact, and now she’s stopped it again. It’s absolutely appalling that my son is allowed to suffer like this, and everybody in “the system” just stands by and let’s it happen. This country has absolutely no system for dealing fairly or sympathetically with family breakdown. If I was some kind of wife beater or child abuser, then I would get what I deserve, but I’m not, and I just feel like a criminal that’s been given a sentence for no reason whatsoever. It’s an absolute living nightmare, and the social service system in this country is an absolute disgrace and absolutley not fit for purpose.

I have a court hearing at the end of October where I’m praying for contact to be re-started. The whole social services system should really be ashamed of themselves, from the Home Secretary down for being part of a system, and allowing a system to continue, that treats loving fathers who’ve done nothing to break up the family in the first place, no different from the worst kind of criminal.

I wish all fathers in a similar position to me all the luck in the world, and hope justice is done, for all your children’s sake. They need their fathers in the their lives more then ever if there is an unstable or vindictive mother involved. They need the stabilty of their father to show them “normal” life, not the twisted “self, self, self” world in which a lot of these clinically depressed women live in. Good luck to you all…

By: John

John — Thu, 31 May 2012 20:51:55 +0000

My ex partner left me after Christmas this year, taking our 2 year old son with her.
She had been violently abusive towards me on many occasions throughout our five years together. I had an unstable mother who left home when I was 8 and I was brought up by my father who worked hard to keep us all going especially since he had to remortgage our home to give my mum the money she wanted. We lived in poverty because of her actions but my dad never had any issue with us going to see her despite the way he felt towards her.
When my ex left, she went to a women’s aid refuge. I have never harmed a hair on her or my sons head, on the contrary it was me who had been attacked over and over again, on one occasion she beat me around the head because I fed my son some porridge, he was severely under weight (4th percentile on weight chart) and I had taken him to the doctor and involved health visitors and was following their advice.

The last time I saw my son was nearly a month ago. Apparently being curt with someone is now abusive behaviour, so during hand over when I was holding my son she snapped and pulled him out of my arms so hard it hurt him, he was screaming out for me as she disappeared down an isle in the supermarket, all I can remember is the way he was screaming out for daddy with his arms out stretched for me, I let it go because I didn’t want to make it any worse for him. My ex was very depressed and wasn’t really involved properly for the first year of our sons life, it was me who was the primary carer. I didn’t want social services involved at that point as I know how useless they were when I was a kid (no change there un-surprisingly).

This story goes on and on but the point is that if this has happened to me, it has happened else where and I know that the system is supporting women who are unwell to damage their children. The social worker I had been dealing with recently didn’t understand how this is child abuse. No support is available for me and I believe going to court will settle nothing until things change.

By: simon carr

simon carr — Fri, 25 May 2012 15:42:52 +0000

i fought very long and hard for over 2 years for shared resadency ie equil rights i belive i should of had shared resadency equil rights all aloang but sadly the goverment dont belive in equality during those 2 and a half years my children were not just stopped from having any contact with me because of false alligations but there grandparents also even though no aligations were ever made about them it sounds like a happy ending but it isent i won shared resadency but because one of my sons is disabled my ex wife wonted to claim extra money in carrers allowance on top of the full rate d.l.a she already gets for him she had to stop me carring for him so she ignored the shared resadency order knowing that she will only get £85 fine of the cort for emosionally abuseing my kids again but will gain a extra £60 a week for the rest of her life and will never have to look for a job this was in febuary i havent seen my children since because of how long it is taking to go back to cort for a enforcement order theve not been allowed to see there grandparents since febuary eather yesterday my dad there grandfather died thell never see him again im not even allowed to tell them via a phone call because only the cort can enforce the order at the moment its just a worthless peice of paper the police and social services cant do a thing and if i do anything it will be me who gets arrested because of my gender after such a long mercyless battle my supposed equil rights was just another worthless peice of paper and the goverment is still rewarding my ex wife with money for abusing my children the system destroyed my kids childhood murdered my dad and david cameron has the cheek to blame parents for the riots what parents? the goverment stole those kids parents from them there was always going to be a backlash you cant steal a childs dad and grandparents then blame the dad and grandparents when that child grows up angery and hating the system that abused them im scared that my kids fuiter is going to be no diffrent from those angry young people rioting they have a lot to be angry about i cant stand it when polititions go on about other countrys poor human rights this country cant even stop abusing children what right do they have critisising anyone else

By: leanne

leanne — Mon, 23 Apr 2012 13:21:58 +0000

i am a mother 0f a 6 year old daughter who for the past four years has had a relationship with her dad on a couple of occasions i have had to stop her from seeing him because i was genuinely concerned for her the most recent time i have stopped contact altogether because she kept coming home distressed saying that her dad has been telling her to keep secrets from me and that hes going to get custody of her and she can go and live with him, also he has been saying cruel things to her about me and my current partner who i have been with for 4 years, shes been getting very confused and also very upset and i believe that he is trying to alienate her from me in order to gain her loyalty well im not interested in her loyalty i just want her to be happy and content and not be made to feel confused or scared therefore i have told him to go to solicitors and he has since told me he cant afford to yet he has paid for a carribean holiday and has just had a very expensive tattoo done. sometimes mothers have there reasons i feel for those fathers who have done nothing wrong and urge them to continue fighting but i also feel for those mother who are stuck with making the hardest decisions keep your child from there father or let the abuse continue.

By: Stuart

Stuart — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 08:27:56 +0000

Long story short, I was asked by my wife to move out to my sisters for a couple of weeks to give her some space, which I did as a loving husband trying to work at his marraige, she agreed to let me take my son with me as I would miss him so much, she agreed. She never tried to contact him for the first 8 days, In the second week (Tuesday) she agreed that I would move back home, On the Thursday she called the police and put in a false child abuse charge against me (this was closed straight away!) the next day, I get a text saying she no longer wanted to be with me and she had contacted a solicitor (since found out this was another lie) She took my son out of school early so I couldnt pick him up myself. The Easter holidays started and she ignored all contact from me begging to see him, it’s the worst pain I have ever endured. She spoke to my family that I need a solicitor to see my son and arrange contact. I arranged mediation, she said she was advised to ignore it and to change the locks on my home. I went to my home to talk to her but she was not in, I managed to hug my son for 5 minutes before leaving. I have lost my home, access to my son (not even a phone call to say goodnight). The system is an absolute farce. I plan to go to court for shared residency, She’ll probably want me to go from a fulltime dad to every other weekend. I cant do that. My son is my best friend and he needs me in his life.

By: Sal

Sal — Sun, 08 Apr 2012 21:19:17 +0000

I believe it is extremely important for my 7 year old son to maintain a relationship with his Dad. Initially I had to ask my ex husband if he would like to have him to stay during school holidays etc! Even though I still have so much anger against him for the way he treated us, I try so hard not to use this as ammunition. I experienced this situation as a child, torn between bitter parents and inturn this has made me determined not to do the same to our son. This behaviour results in the child suffering also, which is unfair. Regardless of what has happened between the divorced/separated parents, both should be able to maintain a relationship with their child. However having asked my ex husband if he would like him to stay for the whole of the Easter weekend, he forgot. Then brought him back a day early! Whilst the majority of Fathers I’m sure are desperate for more access, I sympathise totally and do not condone the way some Mothers act out of spite, however, there are a few who obviously aren’t, which I struggle to comprehend.